So today started off rough for me and I found myself sitting around the house crying. I knew I was choosing this yet in the moment I was unable to bring myself out of my discomfort. Then my little miracle boy comes from behind me, gives me hug and sits in my lap. He looked at me with a smile and noticed my tears. He gently wiped them away and then smothered me
with kisses. And that was just the beginning!!!
It was miracle after miracle today for Ka'ēo Jr!!! Koa was home from school today so I did my best to encourage interactive play in the playroom. We made castles with our brick blocks, counted and hung up easter egg cut outs together, and then he even played our bunny hop game with us! We then went on an awesome nature walk together (again he held my hand the whole time, wore his slippers, did not get stuck on anything and listened to me the ENTIRE time...amazing!) He only ism'ed about 10% of the day and the rest of the day he was WITH us. He went everywhere we went and participated in everything we did! He also only had one small short meltdown the entire day (gigantic progress from the many huge long controllable tantrums he once had).
When daddy came home from work, he spontaneously ran to the garage door and waited for him to come in the house to greet him with a kiss! At night he helped me clean up his playroom and helped his daddy get the beds ready for "sleepy time" by helping collect the pillows. Incredible! It's like he's finally aware of us and can handle the stimulation of being around us now.
He once appeared deaf and blind. He pushed away and ran away from contact but now...WOW. It's like he can hear us and see us now...and clearly wants to be with us. So much so that he is choosing to step out of his autism where he feels safe and climb a very steep mountain to be where we are. I once couldn't sing a single note in our house without him yelling and covering his ears. Now I can sing all day long and he stays by side and even sings with me! There once was a time where his own daddy and brother didn't even seem to exist to him...now he is copying his brother and cuddles in his daddy's arms to fall asleep. I mean look at this video...he is watching his brother drum and copying him!!! It's just incredible!!
My heart overflows with joy and gratitude for the miracles I see happening before my very eyes. We have worked so hard to get here and we still have more mountains to climb...but that's what it's all about anyway. It's all about the climb. Thank you to the Son-Rise Program and PRAISE GOD for helping us see our son and our situation as a BLESSING and not a curse. Our special angel is indeed heaven sent...
Koa had no preschool today so I decided to take the boys to the mall and indoor play area. We have kept Ka'ēo Jr from overstimulating environments because we noticed he was not able to handle them...but I wanted to test it out today to see...... how he would do since he has made so much progess. I was a little unsure when I saw at least 20 wild children running around the play area wondering if I had made a mistake. I wished there were less children playing and almost turned the stroller around and left....but instead I took a deep breath and went for it. To my pleasure...he did incredible! He ran around the crazy overstimulating play area with his little brother like any other child in there...climbed the mountain, slid on the slides, observed the other kids around him, looked at me with smiles and ran to give me hugs & kisses every time I called him ...and even left without a fuss. Then he went on all the ride on coin operated machines too!!! This was another HUGE one...in the past he refused to step foot in these rides but today he went in as happy as can be and even pulled me into the little bus with him so he could sit on my lap while Koa was our "London Bus Driver" ;)
I was overjoyed! Thank you, thank you, thank you Jesus!
So we had a pretty big pour down this morning in Hawaii. Ka'ēo pulled me into his playroom, looked at me with a sweet smile and said "open open" - then went into the bathroom and grabbed his stool and brought it to the window so he can look at the rain. I just love that he can communicate his wants with his eyes and with language and even help himself when he needs to now. I also love how he he heard the rain coming before I heard a single drop fall...amazing!
It's so exciting to see Ka'ēo take an interest in most of the games I have been introducing in the playroom! He has been motivated by shapes lately & I noticed he liked the water bottles when hanging out in the kitchen - so this game was another instant hit. ;)
He has also been staying in the games, initiating the games again and just being so receptive to following directions too! All from a child who was completely encapsulated in his own world. Wow! All glory to the God of Miracles!
I'm the HAPPIEST MOMMY in thee entire universe!!! Today my first "DREAM MOMENT" with Ka'eo Jr. came true!!! I asked him for a kiss...he planted one on me - then looked my right in the eyes with a smile and said "MOMMY...I LOVE YOU" --- My heart stopped & my eyes instantly filled with tears. I couldn't believe it!!!! I'm still overjoyed - a moment I will cherish forvever and ever. I know his potential is LIMITLESS...and this is just the beginning!!! :) :) :)
As a busy mommy...you won't read as many blogs from me as you will my husband...but I thought I'd catch up with him and share the letter that I wrote when I went to my Son-Rise training. Both the Start-Up and Maximum Impact courses were life changing experiences for me. I learned to see through NEW eyes....which changed everything. Not only did I truly come to realize the GIFT my son's autism is...but Son-Rise also EMPOWERED me to help my baby on this incredible journey and take matters into my own hands. What a relief not to have to depend on therapists to help my son! Now I feel equipped to train and create an 'Olympic Team' for my baby boy....and it's going to be sooooo much FUN!!! :0) Thank God we were lead to Son-Rise. I believe this journey is our calling.
At the gates entering The Option Institute (home for ATCA & The Son-Rise Program) is a beautiful sign that says A PLACE FOR MIRACLES. Ka'eo Jr. is my little "Miracle in Progress." This is the letter I wrote to him in December 2010 and my Son-Rise Start Up program:
My Dearest Precious Angel ~ Ka'eo Jr.,
I write this letter to you today on a snowy day in December...far, far away from you. The odd thing is that although my heart aches because I miss that sweet precious smile of yours sooooo very much....I also feel closer to you now than I have ever felt before. For in this moment have I realized all that YOU have given me.
I have let go of all fears now and mommy is not worried about your future anymore. I know now in my heart that you were sent to me from Heaven above - exactly as you are and as PERFECT as you are...for a very special reason. I am now beginning to become the person I have always searched to be....and it's all because of you. You have taught me so much since you came into my life....and I want nothing more than to be the best mommy I can be for you and Koa.
I believe in you and your limitless potential. I promise you that I will be your number one fan for the rest of my life and ever after. I never knew a love like this until you...so thank you, my little angel....for all you have given me. Please know that I will love you forever...exactly as you are. You are my glimpse of Heaven.