HAWAIIAN SON-RISE: Ka'eo Jr's Journey Out of Autism
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HAPPY EASTER!

4/20/2014

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This Easter, we remembered that Christ died on the cross for our sins and rose again to join our Father in Heaven.  We are so humbled and grateful for God’s blessings in our lives.  Ka’eo Jr is truly an angel sent to us to save our family.  He’s taught us so many amazing lessons.  

For years after he was “supposed to”, Ka’eo Jr didn’t speak a single word…he couldn’t ever sit still…he wouldn’t look into the camera for any length of time…his skin was so sensitive that he couldn’t tolerate wearing anything on his head…he spent 99% of his days aloof, in his own world, disconnected from us in our world…

There is no word that describes his journey better than a “MIRACLE”…in this video Ka’eo Jr is present, he’s sitting with us, he’s looking at the camera, he’s wearing bunny ears, he’s responsive to our requests, and he even says “Happy Easter!”  

Not only have our lives been blessed by Ka’eo’s amazing journey, but God has also given us 2 more angels, Koali’i and Maraya.   

GOD IS GOOD, ALL THE TIME…and…ALL THE TIME, GOD IS GOOD.
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BELIEVE IN SMALL MIRACLES (Matthew 17:20)

4/17/2014

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Today was filled with small amazing miracles!!! Ka'ēo Jr said "playground" so we went running hand in hand and chased birds TOGETHER! Later he said "walk" to me and we went on a walk TOGETHER and chased geckos...and then EACH OTHER!Three times he looked at me with a smile and said "tickle mommy" as we walked hand in hand on this gorgeous Hawaiian spring day! THREE TIMES!!! He responded to EVERYTHING I said to him. Then...when we went back to the house he immediately pulled me into his playroom and asked me to play hide and seek with him which we played for over 20 minutes! TWENTY MINUTES!!! And get this folks...when I said it was his turn to hide...HE DID IT!!!!

These accomplishments may seem small to most...but they are huge to me because they come from a child who was soooooo UNREACHABLE a few years ago.  A child who appeared deaf and blind and stuck in his own world.  A child who pushed people away and could not say a single word.   And now...wow. I am speechless.  Thank you Jesus for every small miracle I witnessed with my special angel today.
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A Dream Come True

4/5/2014

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For what seemed like forever Ka'ēo Jr had the hardest time naming the people around him. People with autism are described as being "being in their own world" and seeking predictability and sameness. They are drawn to objects rather than people because objects are controllable and people are not. My son could communicate his wants and label objects and things in a book easily. He just could not label people. We tried making posters and albums and photo cards in the past but he just could not get the concept that people had names. 
I finally let go of being attached to him doing this. I never let go of my want for this but decided it was okay if he never did it...that I knew he loved me and knew that I was his mommy even if he never called me "mommy." I believe in him and held on to the dream that someday...when he was ready...he'd do it. 

Yesterday my dream came true! He asked for me 3 times yesterday!!!! THREE TIMES!!!His Auntie Anna, Uncle Danny and his Daddy all told me he asked for me by saying "Mommy" on his own!!! Then when I went in his playroom to say goodnight he looked at me and said "Mommy" all on his own!!!! No prompting or requesting! I then brought down some pictures and taped them to the wall and he named every person!!! "Anna, Daddy, Koa, Mommy, Kathleen ("Katy"), Danny ("Annie" - lol)" and then smiled at me...I pointed to my face and he said "MOMMY!!!" then ran into my arms giggling!! I cheered and gave him a zillion kisses!!!! Wow. He did it!!! Sigh...

THANK. YOU. GOD!!!
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Ka'eo Kissed His Sister!

4/3/2014

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Ka'ēo Jr has come a long way when it comes to his awareness of the people around him. When his little brother Koa was born he was so aloof that he didn't even acknowledge his baby brother's existence! It wasn't until Koa was 20 months old that Ka'ēo Jr began to "see" him. Now fast forward to today...here he is kissing his baby sister Maraya, helping me change her diaper (he hands me a diaper from the drawer and opens it up...and even identifies the Sesame Street characters on them)...and then when asked - he identifies his eyes and her nose too! So sweet...
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BATHROOM MIRACLES!!! 

7/22/2013

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I know...I know...my son is gonna be so mad at mommy someday when he's older and finds out I posted a picture of him on sitting on the potty...but this HUGE HUGE HUGE folks!!!! Autism parents out there understand how challenging it can be to teach simple basic things like encouraging their child to look at them and talk...so you can imagine how challenging it can be to potty train a child with autism! 


Last night Ka'ēo Jr SELF-INITIATED going poop in potty!!! Then he did it again this morning!!! Not only am I overjoyed at how often he is pooping (ASD parents again understand what a HUGE deal that in itself is!!!) but I mean WOW --- He looked me in the eyes, said "potty...poo poo", pulled my hand to go with him to the bathroom, reached for his mickey mouse seat, pulled his bottoms off, sat on it and went!!! I was absolutely amazed!!! Hallelujah...THANK YOU LORD!!! And not only that...but the morning was flooded with miracle after
miracle with tons of meaningful looks, smiles, spontaneous language, imitation, flexibility and his receptive language and audio processing has soared!!! 



He even gave Koa 4 kisses this morning!!! All this from a child who once was completely UNREACHABLE, appeared blind and deaf when you tried to interact with him, often pushed people away, would tantrum or react as if in pain to certain stimuli like the sound of the toilet flushing or the garage door opening. 


I am beyond amazed at how far he has come. We've still got a steep mountain to climb but I know with God..all things are possible....and He is leading us on this journey...so I know our angel is going live up to his name: Ka'ēo - "The Victorious One"

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More Miracles...

3/25/2013

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Koa had no preschool today so I decided to take the boys to the mall and indoor play area. We have kept Ka'ēo Jr from overstimulating environments because we noticed he was not able to handle them...but I wanted to test it out today to see...... how he would do since he has made so much progess. I was a little unsure when I saw at least 20 wild children running around the play area wondering if I had made a  mistake. I wished there were less children playing and almost turned the stroller around and left....but instead I took a deep breath and went for it. To my pleasure...he did incredible! He ran around the crazy overstimulating play area with his little brother like any other child in there...climbed the mountain, slid on the slides, observed the other kids around him, looked at me with smiles and ran to give me hugs & kisses every time I called him ...and even left without a fuss. Then he went on all the ride on coin operated machines too!!! This was another HUGE one...in the past he refused to step foot in these rides but today he went in as happy as can be and even pulled me into the little bus with him so he could sit on my lap while Koa was our "London Bus Driver" ;) 

I was overjoyed! Thank you, thank you, thank you Jesus!

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What's Your Fuel?

7/13/2012

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My mentor, Bears Barry Neil Kaufman posed an interesting question on facebook today. 

He said, "My fuel is being mission-driven (to teach what we teach, to help as best we can), absolutely loving what I do, fee...ling endlessly grateful to have the freedom to choose this life and so, so, so excited and fascinated to continue climbing my mountain and climb along with others who are heading up similar mountains...let me know what is your fuel...or the new fuel you can start putting in your engine  -- right now!!!!"
 
Others have asked my wife and I, "just how do you do it all?".  Since, these past 10 days, Jackie has been in Massachusetts, at the Option Institute for a two seminars called, The Happiness Option Weekend and Optimal Self-Trust (both are amazing!), and I'm at home alone with the boys, I even asked myself at the start of the week, "How am I going to do it all?"  So tonight, I finally decided to see if I could answer that question, (thanks to Bears' post).  This was my response:

This week, being "single daddy", working 2 jobs from home, running our Son-Rise Program, loving our boys...yes fuel...wow...how timely!!!

 My fuel this week is:
1. absolutely loving my incredible children and wanting the best for them ~ to continue to grow, be safe, be healthy, and love life.
2. completely loving my beautiful amazing superwoman wife and wanting the best for her ~ to find her own answers this week on the mountain with you, to learn to live the life she chooses and to love every second of it and to love every ounce of herself.
3. being so grateful for all of the incredible blessings my lord Jesus has given me ~ my children, my best friend, our home, our health, Ka'eo Jr's autism, my jobs, my challenges, my weaknesses, the Option Process, The Son-Rise Program, our friends, & life
everlasting.
     Yes, these are specifically my 3 "E's" during these 10 days at home. 
I started the week out crying (literally).  I embraced my fear, my anxiety, my wants and ran toward them with open arms.  I BELIEVED in me, in us, in you Bears.  Now, I'm ending the week sprinting, even more energized than when it began, even more thankful for life's OPPORTUNITIES, even more loving of my God, my children, my wife, & myself.
         
Thank you for this question Papa Bears ~ Barry Neil Kaufman, you always know what to say ♥ ;oD 


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Ka'ēo & Koa Play Together

6/26/2012

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Yet ANOTHER miracle in our home. Just 8 months ago, Ka'eo Jr had yet to even acknowledge his younger brother Koa's very existence. Tonight we were amazed to see Koa bring a game of wooden beads over to Ka'eo Jr and they both began stringing the beads and playing TOGETHER. Not just next to each other but TOGETHER, without any of us around to facilitate nor initiate their play. We are completely humbled and amazed at the Lord's miracles!

When asked about the amount of attention we give Ka'eo Jr. vs Koa, we explain that we are giving Ka'eo Jr as much attention as we can right now to give Koa a beautiful gift, a brother, who he can play with, and grow with, and be best friends with, for the rest of their lives, long after we are gone. 

Tonight was an amazing glimpse of that beautiful future we are movig towards as we hold hands with each other in love and the Lord's grace. Thank you Jesus!
 

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Happy Halloweenie

11/1/2011

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It is fascinating to view the world from the eyes of a family with Autism.  I look at everything so differently than I ever did before.  Our little angel, Ka’eo Jr, is only 3.5 years old.  So I can still vividly remember viewing everyday things such as going to the store, visiting a friend’s house, eating a meal, getting ready for bed, or even taking a bath just like everyone else around us still does.  So simple, so obvious, and really no big deal…autopilot…cruise control…compared to
now.

Now, everything matters…the time of day, the amount of people around, the noises…so many noises, the smells, the colors, other kids, how long since our last meal, how long we’ve been awake…EVERYTHING matters… exponentially more than it ever did before.

So now we’ve arrived at the first holiday of the season…Halloweeeeeeeeeeners!  It’s AMAZING to think about just how much the meaning of this holiday has changed for me over the course of my life…  As a baby: so scary and unpredictable.  As a toddler: so exciting and full of mystery.  As a kiddo: so sweeeeeet and sugary.  As a teenager: so mischievous and daring.  As a college student: so sexy and competitive.  As a young adult: so wild and out of control.  As a new  Christian: so silly and foolish.  As a new parent: so sweet and hopeful.  As new father of a child with Autism: so frustrating and heartbreaking.  As a Son-Rise Daddy: so what? …and SO
fulfilling.

Tonight, we were in a bit of a dilemma.  Our son Koa (neurotypical) was now 2.5 and ready to experience his first Halloween as a little person.  What I mean by that is now he is really aware of what’s going on in the world and he truly has his own personality and really knows what
he wants and doesn’t want.  This means the holidays will have more meaning for him than they ever did before because he’s not a little baby being carted around from house to house, party to party, not really knowing why or what we’re doing.  For all these reasons we wanted more than ever to take him trick or treating, or at the very least, to the neighborhood block party
thingamajig. 

On the other hand, our little Ka’eo is not at all ready for that.  He would be completely overwhelmed at any type of party, he wouldn’t want to keep walking from house to house, he’d very likely end up stimming with the very first pile of gravel or patch of grass he sees on the
sidewalk.  So we absolutely weren’t going to take him out of the serenity and safety of our home tonight.  So what do we do?

Well, we decided it would be fun for Koa and Mommy to go for a little while to the neighborhood
Halloweenie block party and I would stay home with Ka’eo. 

Mommy and Koa left the house and there I was in my Halloween costume (an old faded Ghost Busters t-shirt) with my little angel, Ka’eo Jr, sweetly humming and dropping paper in front of his eyes in the corner of our living room.

I whispered to him that I was going to his playroom and I would love it if he would come play
with me when he was ready.  At that I left him and went into his Son-Rise playroom.  A few moments later I heard the pitter patter of little feet behind me.

“Hi Ka’eo!  Thank you for coming to see me!  I love you!” I exclaimed.  He smiled as he stared past me and gave a sweet little squeal as he sat by the door of the room, not quite committing to the idea yet.

I picked up his little plastic toy magnet squares he’d stacked expertly in a row.  I tossed one between on us on the carpet…”Woah!”  I said with a smile. 

Ka’eo looked at the square with curiosity.

I tossed another between us, “Woah!” I said again with a snicker.  He looked up at me and
quickly back down to the new square.  I did it again and waited…

“Woo” he said and looked at me again.

“Yes!” I celebrated and quickly tossed another square toward him.  The anticipation was painted on my smiley face.

“Woah” he said with more confidence.

“That’s right!” I proclaimed and threw another square into the pile…it clicked onto one of the previous magnets squares on the floor.  Seeing this Ka’eo quickly scrambled over to it, separated the two pieces, and sat back down ready for the game to continue.

He looked at me again and I began to say “W..” he interrupted me with a loud “Woah!”

“Yes! Woah! Throw!  You said it!” I answered and quickly tossed another square out.

Ka’eo giggled with understanding.  “Throw!” he commanded.

“Throw? Okay Daddy throw!” as I tossed another out towards him.

“Throw Daddy!” he sang to me and then he jumped up and ran over to me.

I grabbed him up quickly and gave him a kiss.  “Tickle me,” he said through his teeth as he braced in anticipation.

“Daddy Tickle!!!”  I shouted and our game was on!  We spent the next half an hour laughing and tickling and wrestling with each other in such love and happiness.

After so much fun, he ran back over to his pile of ripped paper, scooped it up and said, “come on”.  I agreed and followed him back to his little corner of our living room and we sat down together to join in sweet meditation as he skillfully picked up his tiny pieces of paper and watched them fall through his gaze.  I sat in front of him, our feet touching at the toes and dropped my own little pieces.

We built a bridge into his blissful world.  I wondered what it was he loved about this so much and knew whatever it was, it was healing.  I drifted back into my own rhythm, watching the tiny pieces of paper fall gently to the ground like snowflakes.

Mommy and Koa came home shortly thereafter.  She told me how crowded it was but worth it to see little Koa make friends with a cute little Minnie Mouse near the kids games.  Koa looked so cute in his Blue’s Clues Steve outfit.

I’m glad Koa got to experience Halloween this year with Mommy.  For me, well…I believe this was the best Halloween I’ve ever had, connecting with my little man in ways, for a time, I never thought possible.  Truly, happiness is a choice, and I’m so thankful God has shown me how to find it.
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Heaven on Earth

10/24/2011

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It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to  BLOG.  Our Journey has been so exciting and filled with so many blessings, I sometimes forget to stand still and take a breath…

I was fortunate enough to be able to go to an advanced Son-Rise Program training called Maximum Impact 2 weeks ago.  What’s more amazing is my father came with me, inspired to help Ka’eo Jr become all that he can be…to reach his limitless potential!  
 
My revelations at Maximum Impact were 90% attitudinal.  I’m finally seeing the power we have within ourselves to create permanent change in our limiting beliefs.  True love and happiness
is available to any of us and it doesn’t come from any other source but our own choosing, REGARDLESS of our outside circumstances or past (the stimulus).

Since learning how to TRULY love myself, my son, and my family without any judgments, any expectations, and with no conditions my eyes are completely WIDE OPEN…and so is my heart. I’ve just spent the most 1-on-1 time with my son in his Son-Rise PlayRoom than I have in any other week - since we STARTED our Son-Rise Program.  The difference???   My choosing...that’s it.      Isn’t that amazing?

When it REALLY comes down to it, it was simply because of my own choices...

All this time, I’ve only “not had enough time” or been “too tired” or thought “Ka’eo Jr’s too tired” because I was choosing to believe that.  It’s a funny thing about not having “enough time” or being “too tired”…if the building was burning would you be too tired to run outside? 
Have you ever not had enough time to go to work? …not likely, huh?

Looking at Ka’eo, Jr. with such joy, admiration, and enthusiasm has made such a difference in the PlayRoom.  EVERY SINGLE TIME I play with him he shows me something new and does
something he’s never done with me in his entire life!  Simply stated…miracles are a daily occurrence in my house.  What an amazing blessing my son has been to me.  In all his autistic bliss, he is my little savior sent directly from God.  He is my greatest teacher on this earth.

Today, in the midst of our playtime, I stacked some of his little toy cups and gave it to him. 
True to his perfect rhythms, he began to sprinkle the cups down on to the floor.  My new found clarity lead me to cheer him on, “go Ka’eo go!  You’re dropping the cups!  Yes Baby, you can do it!!!”  I was celebrating him just as any other parent might celebrate their own son as he charges down the field toward the end zone.

Ka’eo Jr looked at me with wonder…  I celebrated his spontaneous look into my eyes and quickly stacked the cups again, “here you go! You’re the best! Do it again! Woo hoo!”

As Ka’eo Jr sprinkled the cups again, I pounded on the carpet and cheered as if he was dribbling past all defenders, ready to shoot the winning basket, “alright Ka’eo!  Look at that!  You’re soooo good at that!”


Ka’eo Jr giggled to see my amusement and when he was done he squealed with accomplishment and ran to me. I grabbed him and tickled him and we giggled and laughed together!  

Again and again we played our new game, complete interaction, sincere enthusiasm, and pure love of one another.  At the end of our session I realized he’d looked at me, SPONTANEOUSLY, 91 times.   
 
Heaven on earth is REAL, it happens every day in Ka’eo Jr’s playroom…BELIEVE
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    Authors

    Jackie and Ka'eo Griffin Sr. are the authors of this blog.  We want to recourd our journey with our first born son, Ka'eo Jr, as we work together towards his recovery from autism.  Mahalo for reading.  Please share your thoughts with us!

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